a settled place

"This is the work of tending - and it is the work that makes up most of life. To tend is to make small, frequent, repeated actions without immediate results, but with long-term payoff. Tending is the language of habits and rituals. It is hard work, because it is usually menial and persistent. It is embedded in diligent process instead of fast and easy results. Tending is hard. It is often monotonous and seemingly insignificant. As I tend to my garden each day, there is little evidence of change. I cannot see my plants growing in front of my eyes. But I continue to water and fertilize, stake and weed, because I know that the cumulative effect of these small, consistent interventions will be a harvest." ( Daughers of Promise, "Tend" , p. 7) For me, at this stage, parenting is tending. It is hard work, tedious, monotonous. I say the same things, at about the same times, every day. Over and over, we have to re-learn to be kind, respectful, and use our words instead of

This was to be an eventful day for the travelers. They had hardly been walking an hour when they saw before them a great ditch that crossed the road and divided the forest as far as they could see on either side. It was a very wide ditch, and when they crept up to the edge and looked into it they could see it was also very deep, and there were many big, jagged rocks at the bottom. The sides were so steep that none of them could climb down, and for a moment it seemed that their journey must end.      "What shall we do?" asked Dorothy despairingly.      "I haven't the faintest idea," said the Tin Woodman, and the Lion shook his shaggy mane and looked thoughtful.      But the Scarecrow said, "We cannot fly, that is certain. Neither can we climb down into this great ditch. Therefore, if we cannot jump over it, we must stop where we are." (The Wizard of Oz) As I listened to the children's librarian read aloud this morning about the complex pr